There are some things you don’t want to lose!

I’m sure we all have a story like this one…. But what can it tell us about listening to our subconscious?

Arriving home Monday lunchtime, and feeling quite tired after a long Dance weekend (I’m a keen ceroc dancer), I decided to check my diary to see what clients and appointments I had booked in for the week.


I did my unpacking
. Checked every nook and cranny for the diary that should have been in my handbag.

Still, no diary.

Maybe it had fallen out of my bag in the car. I messaged my friend Chris we had travelled in his car for the weekend. Then I repeatedly phoned Pontins where we had stayed. Only to be cut off every time before even getting past the recorded message.

Frustration was starting to set in.

I decided to give up on the phone and send them an email. I thought I recalled looking at my diary once while I was there. So, it was quite possibly still there.

Chris got back to me very quickly. It wasn’t in the car.

“Right”, I thought. “Make a list of everyone you need to contact about appointments”. Then I realised I needed an awful lot of details from my diary for tax returns too! Concerned that I would miss an appointment or let someone down, I reminded myself that getting stressed about it wouldn’t help.

I am the Stress Medic after all….

I was pretty sure I must have lost it at Pontins. But tuning into my inner feelings I just couldn’t find any part of me that felt it would be returned from there. Now I don’t like that kind of negative feeling. I wanted to think positively about it being returned. But I couldn’t shake it off. Maybe I was just being realistic? I mean, they couldn’t even answer the phone!

On Tuesday morning (still nothing from Pontins), I went out to buy a new diary and started to contact people. Lunchtime came and I needed to get ready for a client. Walking through the door of my log cabin, I immediately noticed an oddly positioned piece of paper on my desk and picked it up.   

Underneath was my diary!

My memory of having it in Southport was entirely false. Poor Chris! He had twice (just to be sure) searched every inch of his car. I had wasted a whole day.

On reflection I know our minds and memories play tricks on us.

My memory of checking my diary that weekend could have been no more than a thought. Perhaps the reason I couldn’t see it being returned from Southport was because, subconsciously, I knew it wasn’t there. But then, subconsciously, I must have known I’d left it on my desk! Maybe if I’d accepted that inner feeling of ‘it won’t come back from there’, and stopped to remember how memory plays tricks (no pun intended) I might have found it sooner.

Counting my blessings

The understandings and techniques I work with now helped me get through the time when my diary was lost without going into a complete meltdown of stress and anxiety. So now I have my diary back and another interesting lesson on how our minds work…or don’t 😀

Oh, by the way, still no reply from Pontins…..